Eating Out

Hey everyone!

So today's post is on an issue that I have had for about two and a half years now. I haven't come across anyone who also has this issue before which is why I want to tell you all about it because I want to see if anyone else also has it. That issue is eating out.

Now you may be thinking what's her problem? What's wrong with eating out? I'll tell you what's wrong. It annoys me that whenever I go out somewhere to eat, the majority of the time I will be less than half way through my meal and I start to feel really sick and can't eat any more.

There's never anything wrong with the food. The food is always really nice. I don't know what it is that makes me feel like this. And I hate it. I hate the fact that I can't go out for a meal, not even with my family, friends and just people who I feel comfortable with in general, without not being able to finish a meal. I always end up having to get up and leave because I fear that if I stay in the room any longer I'm either going to be sick or I'm going to start having some sort of anxiety or panic attack.

I hate being like this. My mum and dad both know that I feel like this (they don't know about my anxiety) so I always have to make sure I'm sat by one of them so that if I do start to feel sick I can tell one of them and they'll make some sort of excuse for me to leave. Most of the time it's she's feeling a little ill. We're going to go and sit outside for a bit. Problem is, I always feel really anxious about getting out of these situations, as much as I want to get out of them, and it gets to the point where I'll either leg it or slowly start to remove myself from the table. Sometimes I won't even say anything about it and I'll just sit there and pretend nothing's wrong and if anyone asks me why I'm not eating, I'll tell them that I'm full.

It's slightly worse when I'm with friends. I don't normally get this sick feeling when I'm with my friends so it's normally alright but when I do, there's no mum or dad for me to tell so I can go outside. I'll usually just try and sit there and take short, deep little breaths but try and make it so that it's not noticeable by them. I'll either do that or go to the toilets and try to calm myself down.

I hate what's going on with my life and I just wish it could all stop. I have googled about this sick feeling but nothing's come up. I guess that's why I haven't been to the doctor's because it seems like it's just me that's going through this so it can't be that bad. Right?

If any of you also get this sick feeling please comment below if you know what it is or if you have any advice for me about what I can do in these situations. Even if you don't get this sick feeling but have some advice I'd still love to hear it so please comment below. Or you can tweet/DM me on twitter @teenagelifebeth or email me if you really want to teenagelifebeth@gmail.com

Love Beth xx